Prostitutes Take Offense at Comparison to Democrat Politicians

December 20, 2009
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Drunken sailors aren’t the only group offended at being likened to DC Democrats. Via Gateway Pundit, Canada Free Press reported that prostitutes are deeply offended at being compared to democrat politicians. Who can blame them?

Members of the world’s oldest profession are infuriated by the relentless and invidious likening of their industry to the world’s second oldest profession. Word on the street, literally, is that hookers are prepared to exact an apology for the defiling of their good names.

Even those not well acquainted with the whoring business should be able to appreciate the asymmetry between a freely bargained for and mutually beneficial exchange, versus extorting taxpayer funds in the service of tyrants.

Paid escorts everywhere are especially aggrieved by the hooker title being conferred upon thoroughly contemptible politicians; including Mary Landrieu and Ben Nelson. Nebraska Democrat Nelson, who was elected on a pro life platform, sold millions of unborn babies in exchange for extravagant tax payer funded perks for his soon to be former home state.

Nelson has tried to mitigate his betrayal as an abortion opt out compromise, which Nebraska Republican Mike Johanns correctly defined as a mere “accounting gimmick”.

The clause is an ersatz segregation of funds rule, which nobody believes will be effective.

“The really heartbreaking thing for Nebraskans, we are a pro-life state. Nebraskans will now be faced with a situation where they know that their dollars are going to provide funding for abortions across the country,” Johanns said.

I extend my deepest apology to hookers and drunken sailors everywhere for tarnishing their reputations by comparing them to Democrats.

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